Something I don't often do on my blog is write, what I like to call, 'thought-pieces'. Those beefy blog posts where you express all your feelings and thoughts on a certain topic. One recent favourite was Corrie's about being on the pill. Other bloggers who I always love reading their thoughts on topics are Hannah, Victoria, Sophie and Em, to name a few.
But I never really write anything like that. Mainly because I don't feel like I can articulate what I mean properly through writing. I have tried it once when I wrote about my feelings on working and my career, but I wasn't that confident about putting that post out there because it was all about my thoughts and was quite personal. I'm much happier and more at ease talking about things on my YouTube channel than I am writing it down for my blog.
Today I thought I'd change that and write about some thoughts I've been having recently about make up because there has been some talk of it in the media and I would like to share my feelings about it. So bear with me while I try to articulate the word vomit from my head in a coherent way.
I have been wearing makeup since I was about 13, and wearing it everyday since I was about 15. Like many, throughout my teenage years it was a necessity, I didn't want any boys to see me without it on. I did get spots as a teenager but never suffered from acne or severe breakouts so I mainly wore makeup to look girly and to distract from the thing I didn't like about myself, my teeth.
Back then I dabbled in all the drugstore makeup and foundations that probably looked ridiculously caked on and rarely matched my skin. In all honesty I probably looked better without it.
As I grew up into my late teens and early twenties through to uni I got more into makeup and started to try more things, but I still always wore makeup. There was no way in hell I would ever dare to go out of the house without my makeup on, even if it was just to the local shop for milk I would at least need mascara and concealer on. When I first started staying at Luke's when we were 19, I slept in my makeup (the idea of that makes me want to vom now) because I didn't want him to see me without my makeup on, in case he thought I didn't look as nice. Instead he just had to deal with mascara stained pillow cases. Lovely.
Don't get me wrong, I would walk around my home and my uni houses in front of my housemates without make up on, but I wouldn't leave the house like that. I wasn't so bothered about it in front of friends and family, but I was worried what I would look like to other people I didn't know, without makeup on.
As I went through uni, I started to get more into makeup, but ironically I started wearing less of it on a day to day basis. In my late teens I always used to use kohl liner on my upper and lower waterlines and lid. But at uni, I started only lining my upper waterline and my lids. Also the trend came around for BB creams so I started using less base and eventually ended up only using concealer. Which I still do now.
Which brings me to now. Over the past year or so, I haven't been that happy with my skin, with more breakouts on my jawline and cheeks, its been bugging me. Despite this, I feel like I've had a make up epiphany.
Who gives a flying F what my face looks like without make up on.
This is my face, it's the only one I've got, and if I can't be bothered to put make up on today, I'm not going to. I didn't wear makeup 4 out of 5 days last week to work, and I actually don't care anymore. I have been blessed with relatively ok skin. I don't suffer from acne, and there are people out there who do that are brave enough to go bare-faced to show their acne story. So what is my problem? I have a wonderful boyfriend who calls me beautiful when I don't have a scrap of make up on. And I've realised that I don't care what the world thinks of my face. Men go every day without make up on and no one bats an eyelid, so why shouldn't girls.
Again, don't get me wrong, I do like makeup and will still be wearing it, and it does make me feel good about how I look. But my point is, if I decide one day I can't be bothered to put it on, I no longer care about popping to the shops barefaced, or going to work sans mascara and concealer. If anyone I see thinks negatively about my face because I don't have make up on, that says more about them than it does me.
Celebrities like Alicia Keys who recently went to the VMAs bare faced, really inspire me to show that you don't have to wear makeup all the time. A lot of the stigma about not wearing makeup has been brought about by society and can really negatively affect young influential girls. You don't always have to be plastered in makeup.
As I said before, I will still be wearing makeup and if I could afford a Kardashian make up artist to make me look on-point flawless some days, I totally would. But I no longer feel that pressure to be made up to face the world everyday. So today I thought I would bare my face on my blog for the first time ever and say; make up, I love you and you're a wonderful thing, but if I can't be arsed to put any of you on my face tomorrow, who gives a crap.
p.s. I hope this brain word vomit has made a little bit of sense! Let me know if you like this kind of post and I will try my hardest to put some more of my random thoughts down in the future!